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Friday, December 20, 2013
Thesis Statement
The most prominent form of resistance against the Taliban comes from the young women and girls of Afghanistan in the form of education, speaking out against the injustices they face, and in one case, gaining world attention for doing so.
I would reword the part where it says "in the form of education" to something like "in the form of protests for education." Otherwise, I really like it!
I agree with Morgan. I also think that you should try and shorten the sentence. In a way it sort of drags on. Other than that, the content is all there.
I would reword the part where it says "in the form of education" to something like "in the form of protests for education." Otherwise, I really like it!
ReplyDeleteI agree with Morgan. I also think that you should try and shorten the sentence. In a way it sort of drags on. Other than that, the content is all there.
ReplyDelete