Thursday, December 19, 2013

Thesis Statement

Alexander the Great achieved great military success due to his consolidation of major armies, execution of rivals, and inheritance of an already existing thriving kingdom.

   



2 comments:

  1. This is a good sentence, but you need better adjectives and if you are trying to make your points parallel you need to revise the last one.

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  2. I agree with Caroline, once you change the second point the statement will be parallel, and I also agree when she says you should use better adjectives.

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